I have had this blog post for awhile now. I kept going back and forth on whether or not I should post it. In the end I decided why not! The whole point of my blog is to share my feelings…..

With the end of the year fast approaching, I have been spending some time reflecting on my goals for 2012. What I achieved, what I totally slacked on and what will make the 2013 list?

A BIG goal for me was to let things roll off my back and focus on the happiness of myself, my husband and my son, and to remove negativity in my life. This. Has been HARD.VERY HARD! A friend on Facebook shared the photo at the top of this post and I had to share it as well. I am someone who is dealing with a constant, never ending whirlwind of negativity (not my own or anyone close to me, but an extension of something). I really can’t get too much into it here, but I will say that it is not always so easy to limit my time with negative people. Even if I don’t see these negative people on a regular basis, what they do and say to my loved ones turns me into a serious Mama bird and I do whatever I can to protect them.

Before I get further into this, let me set the record straight. I really am a positive person. Everyday I am thankful for so many things. My husband, my son, great friends, amazing parents who will spend way too long in traffic to drive downtown to baby-sit while I work on things that I am passionate about because they understand and support me, my health of course, my brother who even while living in NYC is there to talk for however long I need to talk. I really am thankful for TONS!

Back to negative people… I’m just going to come right out and say it… I just don’t get people sometimes. Like really? You really think that what you just said should have zero implications? Or really, someone treats someone you love poorly yet you continue to make nice and be friends? Really? Some might say that I need to be more forgiving, or more patient..more…I don’t know what. But what I will say is this, where I come from we believe in respect and it’s a two way street. If I don’t get it, I’m not going to give it, and we tend to stand by our loved ones. What I am actually trying to do is remove contamination and get through to others to get rid of it as well, but it literally feels like I am hitting my head against a wall sometimes as a result. Life is way too short to be angry and bitter, so I am not going let anyone bring me to that level no matter what. No matter what you are going through it is no excuse to treat others badly.

Believe me when I say that I certainly don’t think that everyone needs to go all guns a blazing and defend yourself or loved ones, but there is certainly nothing wrong with saying your piece. To stand up for yourself and then expect that others will understand and support you and not act like nothing happened and everyone is all sunshine and lollipops.

If you’re like me and you can’t actually remove the contamination, be honest about how you are feeling, talk about it, and as hard as it is remember, remember that:

I guess what I am trying to say is….”I am a good enough person to forgive you, but not stupid enough to trust you again”. Oh and the next time I see said negativity, I will be the bigger person and just say nothing at all. Unless of course you start in on who I love, then the gloves might come off 😉

The second weekend in September, my husband – Jeff and I went away for a long weekend to Boston. I love Boston! We first took a trip there when we were dating and we both fell in love with the city, everything from their accents to, the great shops, to the European feel you experience while walking the streets. We swore that we would get back. This year we decided to make it our anniversary trip – we celebrated 2 blissfully happy years on August 27^th, and we decided that we had to watch the Toronto Blue Jays play the Boston Red Fox at Fenway (this was something we were not able to do the first time we went, since the Red Sox were out of town).  So we packed our bags, sent the little man off to Grandma and Grandpa, and headed to Boston.

Everything was going great until Thursday night – did I mention that we landed Thursday morning? We went out for a steak dinner at Grill 23 and it was delicious. We had wine and Crème Brule, it was amazing! But, then I was up the whole night being sick. Just awesome! I was not going to spend our time in one of my favourite cities stuck in the hotel room though. I powered through on Friday, enjoying the sights and walking hand in hand with Jeff, the whole time wanting to just curl up and sleep for days. But it’s amazing what going to bed early will do for you. By Saturday I was rearing to go and I was so excited to get to the game! We went on a batting practice tour, which basically means we got to walk on the field for 3 minutes and then sat above the Green Monster for Red Sox batting practice and I ducked while he tried to catch the balls that they were smashing our way (I’m convinced it was because of our Blue Jays gear ;).) We then went down near the dugout to watch our home team take batting practice. I totally made eye contact with Henderson Alvarez and JP Arencibia! After being drenched in an insane downpour – something we Torontonians don’t have to worry about with a stadium that has a retractable roof, we decided that with an early morning flight, the smart thing would be to head over to a bar and have some beer where we could at least stay dry and warm to wait out the rain and then watch the game on TV. We felt pretty safe walking around in our Jays shirts and hats since they were beating them to a pulp!

I love going out for brunch, here in Toronto, on vacation….it doesn’t matter where I am, I LOVE brunch. So on this trip we took some advice and went to The Beehive, located in The South End of Boston it is a very up and coming neighbourhood. This place has a real eclectic, funky, yet elegant feel to it. See the photos below to see what we ate. I will let you decide who ate what!

For those that don’t know, I really like baseball and going to baseball games. Together Jeff and I have been to many games, 2 of which we went to on our honeymoon, if you can believe it. We have visited a handful of different stadiums in the U.S, but I have to say that Fenway is by far my favourite. I don’t know if it’s because it is celebrating 100 years, or because of how much Boston loves their baseball and their team (despite their shockingly terrible season), but being there was a TON of fun.

For anyone wanting to visit Boston here are my top 6 picks of things to do/see:

 Fenway Park: As already mentioned, I loved Fenway. Though generations have come and gone, Fenway Park remains, much like it did the day it opened on April 20, 1912. It is the oldest baseball stadium in the U.S; many improvements have been made to keep it shining new. Definitely a must see, even if you’re not a baseball fan.

 Faneuil Hall Market Place: In the heart of Boston, Faneuil Hall Marketplace is adjacent to historic Faneuil Hall and is bordered by the financial district, the waterfront, the North End, Government Center, and Haymarket. You can buy great things to eat, just ask Jeff about the chocolate cannoli he said he didn’t like, yet devoured in record time.

 Boston Common: The starting point of the Freedom Trail, Boston Common is the oldest park in the country and ideal for Boston sightseeing. The park is almost 50 acres in size. On both trips Jeff and I really enjoyed finding a patch of grass to take a break, lie down and maybe take a nap!

Harvard University: Harvard University, which celebrated its 350th anniversary in 1986, is the oldest institution of higher learning in the United States. We took a tour of the campus on our first visit and then enjoyed strolling through on our second. Being there makes you want to learn! What an impressive place. No pressure to our little man Brady, but maybe one day we will be visiting him at school there!

Duck Tour: The fun begins as soon as you board your “DUCK,” an authentic World War II amphibious landing vehicle, renovated for sightseeing. First, you’ll be greeted by one of the legendary tour ConDUCKtors, who’ll be narrating the tour. As the best of Boston unfolds before your eyes, your ConDUCKtor will be giving lots of little known facts and interesting insights about the unique and wonderful city of Boston.

 Pub Crawls: Whenever we go on an adult only vacation, hubby and I like to pretend that we are 21 again and go on pub crawls. Let me tell you, Boston is such a great city to do this in! There are so many great pubs to visit, where we can dance and pretend we are students!   You can even find an actual Boston pub crawl map!

Have you been to Boston? What was your favourite part?

For those of you that don’t know, I am very fortunate to be apart of a very exciting new project with Eva Redpath. Her new online show “Get Fit in the City”   with Coral TV has just released its second episode. In the episode, Eva (and I) took a Pilates/Yoga Fusion class with Amber at Misfit Studio.

From the moment we walked up to the studio we knew that we were in for a treat. Misfit Studio is a little studio located in the Queen West area, Queen and Euclid to be exact. It is earthy and warm and bright and is a perfect reflection of its owner, Amber. Even her bathrooms rock! You will find awesome vintage decoration throughout – the walls, seating, and storage and even on the walls of the bathroom. It is super creative, and super edgy and super awesome!

From the time class started, Amber’s style put me at ease and I immediately trusted her and wanted to push through the insane AB workout, even though I felt like my stomach was ripping apart. Her class is Pilates/Yoga fusion, and it is exactly as it sounds.  It is an hour of mat based work where you will stretch, strengthen, sweat and get your heart rate up through Amber’s sun salutations, warriors and lunges. In addition to being a fabulously choreographed class, in the background she plays tunes that you wouldn’t expect to hear in a yoga class and have you wondering why the heck not?!

There were many times throughout the class where I found myself mesmerized by the way Amber moves.  She literally oozes as she moves, it’s gooey and smooth and effortless. All of this matched with her impeccable explanations and cues make this class and this studio a definite must!!

What I love about Misfit Studio (In addition to what I already talked about), is that it’s not your typical studio. I love that! In a city where there are literally thousands of us yoga instructors all teaching you how to downward dog, warrior, stand on your head, etc., you need to find your own niche & a way to set your self apart. Amber has done just that with Misfit Studio.

If you are looking for a studio where you can stray off the usual & predictable yoga trail, then get your butt to Queen and Euclid!

You can check out Eva Pilates/Yoga Fusion class here: MISFIT STUDIO

A few days ago, I opened my binder of notes from the Transformation retreat I went on back in March. In the binder was all the material we had worked on throughout the week (In between our yoga, bootcamp classes and runs) – limiting beliefs, positive affirmations, all of it. It really got me thinking (even more than I did back then) about where many of my negative thoughts come from. Then it hit me, Bullying.  I have been bullied and watching the very much talked about video of the bus monitor from New York state being bullied brought it all together for me. Perhaps growing up I didn’t want to think that I was bullied. Perhaps as an adult I didn’t think that other adults would bully.

I was picked on and made fun for so many things. Growing up I was – believe it or not, tall and skinny, and I got laughed at for that. I wasn’t cute and short like the other girls. I even got bullied by a teacher in elementary school. I remember it so clearly, she wasn’t even my teacher, just another teacher at the school. Every chance she got she picked on me in front of everyone else. There was the time when a friend was taking a picture and she said “don’t take a picture of Lisa; she is so ugly the camera might break”. Or when she was helping out with our class for an art class and I had a question “oh here we go, let’s see what stupid question Lisa has”. As a 12 year old, I didn’t tell my parents because I was worried they would think I was making it up. Instead I kept my mouth shut and for many, many years I felt both stupid and ugly. Other than the teacher, I had many people picking on me for just about everything. I always thought whoever said that the high school years are the best years of your life, are the biggest liars or they were one of the mean girls/guys. I spent my time at the dance studio, dance competitions or at home, wishing I would be invited out to the parties.

When all my schooling was finally over I thought that I could finally start to feel confident about who I am, what I look like etc. I was mistaken. I once worked for someone – an actual adult, who was the biggest bully of them all. I actually longed for the high school mean girls/guys again. Within the first week alone I was called names and shouted at more times than I could count. I would actually fear going to work, heck forget work hours, it was literally around the clock with emails, calls, text messages. During all of this I was going through major personal changes, and I thought this person could be a friend and confidante. Everything I confided in them was used against me, thrown back in my face and talked about behind my back (with my words twisted) with almost everyone I knew. When I finally had the guts to walk away from it all, I took a month off from any work. I needed that time on my own.

For the last few years I have finally started to feel good enough, pretty enough, strong enough, talented enough. I have great friends that are a great support system, an amazing husband who is my best friend, and the best son, who gives the best hugs and kisses ever. Yet here I am feeling like my worlds are starting to collide. I recently found out that this big bully and I have mutual friends, and I am starting to feel those same knots and dread in my stomach.

The new and improved me is trying with all my might to tell that older version of myself that things will be ok. I’m not going to lie, it is damn hard, but I just keep telling myself that it really doesn’t matter that this person is in some way back in life.

Should I ever have to come face to face with them, or any other bully I have met throughout my life, I shall be mature, confident and handle the situation with grace. I will not sink to their level.

To all the moms out there, do everything in your power to raise your little one(s) to be have a good heart, independent mind, be kind, thoughtful, strong and full of grace.  Teach them that bullying is wrong and if they are victims of bullying, those traits will help them to have the courage to stand up to their bully, as I wish I did.  Below are some inspirational quotes that really hit home with me.

I’m in love…with my new Nike Frees. I have wanted a new pair of running shoes for quite some time. My ongoing battle with running shoes has finally come to a stop. I have been saying for at least 2 years that the weight of my running shoes always starts to slow me down at some point during my runs. For me, it’s all about getting faster and stronger.

I had heard about the Nike Free shoe and when I first tried it on about a year ago, while I loved how light it was, I was nervous about how light it was. I was brand spanking new to barefoot running, and felt that I needed to be introduced gradually. Thankfully Nike now has three stages of Nike frees.

1: Nike 3.0 – with a deep flex groove this is the most barefoot shoe. You can roll this little sucker right up into a ball

2: Nike 4.0 – this is for people that have free/barefoot experience. You still get the deep flex grooves, but you have the support needed

3: Nike 5.0 – this is my shoe, and perfect for people who are new to barefoot running.  Flex grooves in the outsole promote a natural stride while the dynamic fit hugs your foot and enhances stability.

I was told that with this shoe you have to allow time for breaking them in. Since it is a barefoot running shoe, you will be using muscles that you have not used before. I took this advice seriously. I did some walking, a couple of short runs and then I took these bad boys out for a longer run, only 8km, but long for my new shoes. I noticed a difference with my first stride. I was lighter, faster, but still in complete control. I was running at a speed that I normally use in races (thanks to my Nike + app, I am now able to track my distance, speed etc). I actually had to slow down a bit for fear that that I would tire myself out way too fast.  I definitely feel that I used muscles that I have never used before in my runs and races, but I feel fantastic!

I am officially in training mode for the Acura 10miler and the Scotiabank Toronto Half Marathon. I am confident that these fluorescent pink babies will help me shave some serious time off.

Have you tried the Nike Frees? Which Free are you, 3.0, 4.0 or 5.0?